Saturday, February 14, 2009

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Present from friend
















Friday, February 13, 2009

Spa Manicure


I had just my manicure and pedicure done this eveing with CALVIN,after long wait and
just an unpleasant encountered with the voxy counter at bugis*puuuuiiiiihhhh**
Yesterday i went to the counter about 5.45pm then the girl said next available time slot will be 07pm,so CALVIN said ok to wait,then we went for our dinner first at dim sum,quiet boring food and made my stomach weird...actually my body felt weird since yesterday afternoon...came back to the counter about 6.47pm,the girl just ignored us then we decided to go out again and came back at 07 pm,the girl try to ignored us again then i just stayed there,didn't care...finally she attended to us then said sorry maybe we could come back at 8.30pm,but finally i gave up i said''no''and said i'll came back next time...
But this afternoon i called the counter again,but finally the girl said i could come at 06.00pm,when me and calvin arrived it was still 05,45,and the girl asked me to come back at 06.00pm,oh shitttttttt...both of us said together hihihi....actually the girl had nothing to do at all...but i followed her instruction and came back at 06.00pm.not bad she did it straight away,and i also asked if there's possibility to do pedicure as well.she said let's see,but finally she did it for both of us...Got incident the girl cut my finger and bleed,she apologised so many time but i said it's ok...you know me well right??i'm alays nice to everybody...but overall experience good...i'm sure we;ll come back for next visit...now my hands and feet are so smooth like a baby...just same as CALVIN hand too....happyyy and thanks my friend....

Valantine's Day

saturday,14,feb,2009
With our LOVE>>dayz are>>Sadday,Moanday,Tearsday,Wasteday.Thirstday,Fightday,Shatterday<<That the sms i received this morning which of course i forwarded to my friend again.yesterday we were at gift shop at SANMALO shopping centre buying chocolate for valentine day,lots of students doing last minute shopping for valentine's day,one young guy asking how much a box of chocolate with ared heart shape box at Godiva is it??it is Mop100 patakas,then it made me think how expensive the price of celebrating Valentine's day.but maybe he asked the wrong shop,that's all.there are still a lots of shops selling these kinds of stuffs without the need to hurt your pocket though.
This morning i recieved surprise number one,CALVIN came and visit me and bought me a dozen of pin roses.
Surprise number two,he picked blue colour wrapped and pink ribbon,my favorite colours*wow****
I'm so much happyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy but not totally complete yet coz no any present from''rock''huh...so bad and so saddddddddddddd i feel.

Valentine reflection.


Anyway this things always inside my mind,be it during Valentine's day,if obly i could
do Ctrl-Alt-Del,or reset my life all over again...but i realise whatever had been done,can not undone.it's no use to keep on regretting about the past,what i can do is not to repeat the mistake and just continue life and learn from the lesson...

It's sounds simple and easy...but yet again i find it's very hard to practice...and i hope this year i would be able to learn how to just continue life and try not to repeat the same mistakes anymore.try to do whatever i want to do because life is short...

I dont want to live my life and regret at the end,just because i didn't have chance or not giving my self a chance to do something that i really wanted to do in my life...

hopefully i could have the courage to do so...ckckckckckck...

Sweet messege from baby''REHAN''

FROM:ROCK
13,feb,2009

Life ends when stop dreanibg,hope ends when u stop believing and love ends when u stop caring.so dream,hope and love...makes life beautiful.


FROM:ROCK
12,02,2009

I'm feeling so happy,do u know why?coz i'm so much lucky,do u know how?coz god loves me,do u know how?coz he gave me a gift.do u know what?its YOU my love.


FROM:ROCK
09,feb,2009

Hi moon,dim ur light,hello wind!breeze soft,hi flower!blossom slowly.hello earth!
spin gently cause my friend is going to sleep.good night.


FROM:ROCK
07,FEB.2009

The smalles words is''I''the sweetwst words is''LOVE''And the dearest person in the world is''YOU''Thats why I LOVE YOU.

Messege greeting from MY LOVE''ROCK''

Fom:ROCK
RECIEVED:02:39:51AM
+923335151239

Im sorry honey,i'm really busy in these days coz sunny is here,try to understand me plz.i love u honey.happy valentine honey,i love u forever my bb.


From:ROCK
14,FEB,2009
RECIEVED:02:37:53AM
+923335151239

My baby,mylove and my honey,wishing you very very valentine my sweet heart,i love u
so much my honey,i wish u were here with me and i would kiss u on ur lips.


Fom:ROCK
14.FEB,2009
RECIEVE:02:36:41am
+923335151239

I hope you can understand me honey that i i'm busy,honey,once again,wishing u very very happy valentine.i love u forever my bb.ur mine sweet heart and i'am urs.


Thanks my love...i love you so much and''happy VALENTINE day to you''

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY''BABE ROCK''


To be in love with you such a pleasure,each day i'am reminded that you are such a treasure.you have allowed me to know what love is really about,oh for all things great you make my heart shout with you i want to spend my life yes...my sweet i so want to be your wife,together forever with you is where i shall be our love will shine shine bright for all to see.
I LOVE YPU,I LOVE YOU...what more can i say???
to you my love''HAPPY VALENTINES DAY''i love u jani...

For my love

saturday,14,feb,2009

Dearest my beloved''BILAL''my huntum,my hunny bunnie...

Thank you so much for such a lovely and sweet memory that ready past between us since 14,feb,2008.is not easy to get through our long distance relationship in a year had past.we're walk together in tears,doubting,fighting,argument and jelousing felling to each other.we never know who starting 1st to fight and doubt all the time,wether you or me????but the most is from me....!!!hehehehhe....thanks for your patience and your love you had given to me babe...


I'm so dazzled and touched by your''LOVE''
I'm so grateful to be loved by you...!!!
I thank the lord each day for the wonderful you(even not totally)
No one but you completes me...
I LOVE you hun....!!!
You are the best decision i ever made and will always be...!!!
I'm so happy that each second passes to bring me back to you...
As for the time being,the lord be the protector of our LOVE...
LETS CELEBRATE OUR LOVE...

your wify,your hunny bunnie...

An dry letter for you

friday,13,feb,2009

While i'am waiting here for the news i would like to write you a letter,if that is alright with you.

of course,you do not mind at all because you never mind at all when you are makng rude comments about my self.

you,with your poisonous words coming out of your mouth,you could make me sick to the stomach,you would judge me without looking in the mirror,to see who you are in reality,to see how your image is really like.

you always say that is not important,thata is not something i should take it in personally,but you prove that your words would slice my heart like a sharp knife.you make me cry at night,alone,because there is no one besides me.

here i'am in my greatest pain yet you fail to take notice how fragile i'am,you lash and you spew profanities at me,i have now here to go.

i want to break the tether off the ground,i want to shield my self from you,but i cannot i have nowhere to go,i'am chained to this life with the devil who is waiting to see me fall.

do you realize how much have you hurt me??have you relized that you are cold while i need warm??

i do not want to go on,yet i have too much burden.nobody is here to help,nobody is here to understand the pain,would you just go away and leave me in pain??

i want to scream,i want to be free,my eyes would not dry for one moment.is it too much to ask??have you got no sympathy for me anymore??i'am not an animal,i'am a human being,i have feelings,i'am not a wall.

there is no light at the end of tunnel yet....
pls god help me...!!!!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Rip

thursday,12,feb,2009


Last monday after i finished my shower i saw 4 misscalled in my phone,normally i didn't bother to call back all the misscall,unless i recognized the number.but this time i called back,but when i asked what company is that,the other recipient asked me back who i was.i was confused..i had so many identity,me as....???worker,me as a friend,me as a family,so finally the other party gave up,he said maybe he got the wrong number.
Not long after that the same number called again,and i recognized the voice as my friend''CALVIN''from hongkong,i was so much happy coz he still remember me.not like any other huh....even someone i love also doesn't even remember me,but CALVIN is the best for my life and heart.thanks cal...for yr call and yr care even by sms,phone call,and so email.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Right or wrong

I was sitting on my balcony
not to enjoy the beautiful view like usual...
but tried to make me feel more calm
i had a PROBLEM with my heart...
so i have to think clearly to make an important decision
accompanied with my iPOD+Tissue box
yes,i need lots of tissue to wipe my tears..
because I CRIED a lot too
and suddelly i fell a sleep...
wasn't really realize till i open my eyes and the sky is already dark....x
i've made it...
i mean the decision...
i think it was fine
i was happy too that have made such a right desicion...
but now,i keep wondering...
did i make it right or wrong...??
my heart is full of DOUBT!!!
CAN I TRUST you???
GOD,bin ja imer verwirrt
hab null ahnung!!!

What is life

**Life is an ADVENTURE...Dare it
**Life is a BEAUTY ...Praise it
**Life is a Challenge ...Meet it
**Life is a DUTY ...Perform it
**Life is a LOVE ...Enjoy it
**Life is a TRAGEDY ...Face it
**Life is a STRUGGLE ...Fight it
**Life is a PROMISE ...Fulfill it
**Life is a GAME ...Play it
**Life is a GIFT ...Accept it
**Life is a journey ...Complete it
**Life is a MYSTERY ...Unfold it
**Life is a GOAL ...Achieve it
**Life is a OPPORTUNITY...Take it
**Life is a PUZZLE ...Solve it
**Life is a SONG ...Sing it
**Life is a SORROW ...Overcome it
**Life is a SPIRIT ...Realize it

IT'S ME



You are gold elephant type of person,who tends to be...
>>>Fresh,Straight forward and Hold pure heart.
>>>You look very active,cheerful and articulate.
>>>You are good looking woman heheheheh...
>>>You tend to be very intelligent,and are no a difficult person
>>>Your honest and good personality attracts many people
>>>You also possess will power and have perseverance...
>>>You put yr maximum effort in anyting you do,which gives a favorable
impression to others.
>>>Although,you dont depend on others easly,your rationalism and argumentative
personality is something you should watch ot for.
>>>You sometimes change completely and surprises people.
>>>Those gold elephants who jad lived most of their lives with their parents
have this tendency.
>>>They hurt other people's feelings by being too blunt.
>>>Nevertheless,you tend to be extremely polite most of the times.
>>>Those of you who have left home and live independently tend to be polite.
>>>The loneliness of living on your own seems to mature your character.
>>>You will not go into deep relationship with ordinary office working men.
>>>But you do not go much for macho type and those who assert themselves too
much.
>>>Your cheerful and active personality may give a wrong impression,but you
will be extremely good at keeping your home.

>>>HIHIHI...BELIEVE IT OR NOT,SOME OF THEM ARE SO TRUE....XXXX<<<

WOMAN AND MAN:two wrongs wouldn't make a right

monday,02 feb 2009

03.33PM
We had a fight,its all about nothing actually,NOTHING important.neither me not my girl can control our word.she called me loser and i call her to pissed of,that was just enough for meso before i do something stupider i left her crying.


07.30PM
Home already still sick of my voice,i decided not to talk,great.now i have time to talk with another of my room friend which she never like,thres no more distrubing voice again around me.

Tuesday.
03.44pm
i've a lot time to talk with my other room friend and so hang around together with thm,it really make me happy without her on my side,his what i want since along time ago hheheheheeh.....without that voice or it just me?ok..i'm very sleepy anyway what a day is today...i took my pillow and my blanket and slept on my bed,and suddelly one sound really make ne feed up''her soubd shout at me with this words''why u not cook''??oh shit....i said to her...

09.00PM

hey theres me,her and my other room friends was in the room and we're talking together except her xixixix...no one talk to her yupyyyyyyy....o must thanks to all but she look really upset after fighting with me.unhappy face makes me hold this idea twice,i think that those yesterday fight isn't my fault anyway,so what is the point of appology???

11.00am

Where is her??is everything alright??og she was so sad and keep on crying at the window side....xaxaaxaxax

12.30PM
She was in room together with my other room friends but she doesn't hace word for me....my jaw is sick,i want to talk so bad those fight and everything is nothing but both the silliest things in the world...

Life can be soo funny

saturday,07 feb 2009

I do have''NO''reason to be angry to you,oh my god(allah)..i know that you always have a much bigger plan for us than ours...i've always been told that the way you works do not same at all with the capability of humans brains...but tell me ALLAH,why life can be so funny...??its not that i'm ungrateful with my life,i'm so happy to live my life and be who i am right now...maybe this is just the unordinary work of my humans brain,but ALLAH,i just do not understand,why theres war??why it take so long??why people can be so cruel??why the bad guys happy and the good people have to suffered??i reckon maybe justice just have to wait until the right day...i do remember your promise to us,that after this''rain''there will be a rainbow.
And mighty ALLAH,i have one more question...why do the ages of human life can be so funny...one day you took my friends so fast that they dont even reach eighteen,but on other day you give my grandpa so much lived..and some times baby doesn't even have a change to be born...this is a bit funny to me...but i know and i always believe,theres always be so much reasons for you,the best reasons,that not every human would understand to do that....
and ALLAH,i just want to know,and i know you must already knew''I LOVE YOU SO MUCH''although for me life is so funny,i love life and i promise with all my heart,i will nver ever waste my life...i know life can be short,but ALLAH thanks for giving me my life...

This thing drives me mad..

Say''YES''if you want it,
Or''NO''if you do not want it,
Coz for now.i do not have time for this...
You said''OK''yesterday
But''NOT OK''today
As for now,i do not have time for this...
So better make up your mind..
And let me know if you are''AGREE or DISAGREE''
Coz i really do not have time for this...

A farewell

monday,feb,02,2009

last monday,a day i could never forget.after more than two months speant our time together,through some misunderstanding and unavoided little fights,maybe this is the time to say good bye and see u next time,coz from my botom of my heart i didnt interesting with her anymore.the time has really came...a sweet couple,an acceptable behaviours,a cozy atmosphere,a great understanding,a suitable manners and jabits,good food,clean house,stocks on the fridge,a nice and memorable memories.part time jobs,girl talks,conspiracies,an amazing trip.have fun gone mad,dirty little secrets,friendship are forever,long sleepless nights,laughs and tears,a farwell and last but not least,a gift from heart

My friend says about me???

thursday,06 feb 2009
My friends says about me???

''WHAT YOUR CUTE MONSTER SAYS ABOUT YOU??''
1) You have enthusiasm for almost everything you do in life,you have a super
playful attitude.
2) You are curious about the world,and i love to learn,i rather figure
people out than rush to judge them.
3) You inner demon is pride,you can't help but have a big head sometimes.
4) People think you're cute because you're adventurous,you always bring some
fun,which is super charming.


''WHAT KIND OF MUFFI ARE YOU???
1) You don't like to rock the boat,and you're the most concent when you're making
everyone else happy.
2) You are very loyal,you'll defend your family and friends,even if you secretaly
disapprove of what they're doing.
3) You tend to be a bit shy and withdrawn,you dont make friends quickly/easly.
4) But once you do make a good friend,the chances are high that you'll be friends
for life.

''WHAT TYPE OF CASTLE ARE YOU''???
1) You are a bit tentative when it comes to new experience,You have to push yourself
to try new things,but once you do you love adventure.
2) You like to think that people are impressed by you,you know that you have a lot
to offer.
3) You are a very realistic person,you see the world as it is,flaws and all.
4) Right now,stress occasionally makes you feel trapped in your life.
5) You usually have a clear perspective on things though!!!
6) Overall,your life is calm and steady.not much stirs you,and each day is full of
joy.
7) You are extremely optimistic about the future,you feel like things are always
getting better.

''WHAT YOUR NAME SAYS ABOUT YOU???''
''HANI FIRLIKA''
YOUR NAME SAYS THAT YOU ARE MOSTLY:

1)Charismatic but impulsive.
2)Your name also says you are:
>>Independent but distant
>>Passionate but flighty
>>Fiery but unbalanced

''WHAT KIND OF CEREAL ARE YOU''???

1) You are creative and inventive
2) You don't much the ordinary or normal way.
3) You like to explore new ideas and life style
4) You're the type most ;ile;y to cook your self an amazing home made breakfast
CKCKCKCKKCCKCKCKCKCKCKCKCKCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK......

Pancakes(are simple to make)

Friday,feb,06 2009

I made myself pancakes today,it's actually for breakfast,but i woke up a little(too)late.so i've skipped brealfast and ate the pancakes together with Angga and Jansen for lunch.i don't have any recipe for pancake and was too lazy to search on internet,i meant how hard is it to make a pancake??pancake is simple...pancake is simple...it's the simpliest cake on earth...it's simple...

I've said those words like hundret times,i took self-rising flour,eggs,cocoa powder,baking powder,sugar,milk,salt,vanilli powder,and gathered them all around.i have made two kind of batters,the original-and the cocoa one.i whisked and whisked untill all ingredients were blended with each other,the batter was smooth and thin,mean while i've buttered the pan(better use the nonstick one)then i've poured in the batter to the pan and made a small puddle of batter,i've cooked it like 2-3 minutes in each side,then flipped it,i've made about 12 pancakes,and then i've served it on the plate with a confectionary sugars and blueberry jam on the top.see,it's so dead-simple to make!!!





I for Insomnia

SATURDAY,FEB,07 2009


My long sleepless night became a nightmare,i just can't stand that.at first it was just a change of my biological time,i didn't slep at night,and slept while other people went tp work.it was fun until i found my self wasn't sleep at all.then i relaized in this three weeks,i had just 2-3 hours of sleep each day and this is what i called nothing but disaster,not to mention after efect:Dark circles under my eye,which obviously caused due to my distrubed sleep.i lost my weight about 2 kilos and amazingly don't feel happy about that.i dont know why i can't sleep??but i know this is on the one hand no good and very unhealthy!!!!
But on other hand,it really helped me out during my working time.i could concentrate and focus on my work bcoz there's not much noise at dawn.but still,it shoudn't be this way,a friend of mine asked me to take sleeping pills,but i don't think it's a good idea.sleeping pills is aren;t solution,my other friend told me to see the doctor or psychiatrist,but i dont think it's necessary either,so here i am,sitting on the bedside and still(counting sheeps kumping ober clouds)looking for the rigt solution to my insomania...
Wish me luck.give me back my sleep,i really need that A.S.A.P!!!!

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Children learn what they live

If a child lives with criticism,they will learns to condemn
If a child lives with hostility,they will learns to fight
If a child lives with ridicules,they will learns to be shy
If a child lives with shame,they will learns to feel guilty
If a child lives with tolerance,they will to be patient
If a child lives encouragement,they will learns to be confident
If a child lives with praise,they will learns to appreciate
If a child lives with fairness,they will learns justice
If a child lives with security,he will learns to have faith
If a child lives with approval,they will learns to like himself
IF A CHILD LIVES WITH ACCEPTANCE AND FRIENDSHIP,THEY WILL LEARNS TO FIND LOVE IN THE WORLD.

The key to your heart

You are attracted to those who have split personality-cold as ice on the
outside but hot as fire in the heart.
In love,you feel the most a live when your lover is creative and never lets
you feel bored.
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless,cold-blooded
and sarcastic.
Your ideal relationship is comforting,you crave a relationship where you
always feel warmth and love.
Your risk of cheating is zero,you care about society and morality.you
would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something precious,you'll treasure marriage and
treat it as secret.
In this moment you think of love as something you thirst for,you'll do
anything for love,but you won't fall for it easly.

Just shut up


Sometimes and somewhere i just dont know what to say and mistakenly saying something that shouldn't be said.
I was about to buya take-away whole roast Oporto's chicken of dinner with friends at home.
Me:''can i have whole roast chicken pls??''
Oporoto's staff:Okay,which sauce would you like?(the staff is a young man)
Me:''Mild please''
Oporto's staff:''err......eat here or take away''
Me:....(really can't say anything for a second thinking if anyone is crazy enough to finish a whole big chicken in one go)...take away please...''

Closure



It's been a long time,however i just want to write a thing that keep bugging my mind.how come when i ask the one up there for a closure or to defend me,he does nothing???truth that will open both of my superiors eyes that i'm not lying or did i pressured the girl.
What i want is the one who is up there help me,defend me or get a closure about this problem,i don't like being deceived like this,he done nothing and soon the girl will gone and left the big problem inside,i really need a closure and someone like a lawyer to defend me,can he become a lawyer and defend me??
The time is clickingand so far there is nothing been done,maybe i'm wrong to turned to god to help me??where is the parh??i'm getting lost of hope in here,dont know he really notice it??

Ecstasy



I have a friend who was recently tried ectasy.i was surprised when he told me,becoz as far i have known,he is a guy who always live to the fullest and clean guy(not a smoker.doesn't like medicines and he always maintain his fresh clean face and style),he is like a kid from next door.

After his first use of the ectasy,he told me that he learned and asked experienced people who are using it regulary before decided to try it.he asked his friend to find a high quality one and look after him when he was on drug.Afterwards,he told me his experience,ecstacy does work but it will need around i hour to reach the''high''

At this point,the user will feel a very high energy coming and feel so high and happy then started to shake the feet to release the coming and coming abundant of energy,this is when he started feel like to dance.

He also told me that when he feel high,he can think,yes..think very clear and feel so active with many ideas and he could remember everything that was happening around,i guess maybe that why many talented people(singer,painter,actorand actress,etc)who feel that there is no more ideas or feel that when they get bollocks,they turned to drugs like ecstasy(when they feel so much despair)

Then after some hours on high,like other drug when it wear out,the users will feel so down,suddenly they will feel so empty and there is as very strong emotion which make them feel in a bigger despair that they never feel before.

This stage is the dangerous stage where usually feeling like not wanted,suicide or so low from anyone will be so great,i guess this is why some users can not overcome this down feeling and choose to eat ectasy again to get the high feeling.

Some users did dead bcoz they didn't want to feel the''down time''they wanted the''high feeling''more while forgetting that they would eventually overdose and kill themselves.

As my friend alreadt been told to think only happiness and ignore the down feeling,he tried hard to keep himself happy during this period,hours after using the ectasy??he said that he feel so sick for around 2-3 days.he got headache and aching everywhere in parts of his body.

eskimo restaurant

It was 11th january 2009,my days while i fell a bit broken heart coz of''rock''after i crying and tell the story to my best friend''calvin''after working all day,he arrived at macau on saturday evening,he find a places to staying offer night for hin self,after he took some rest and shower he call me and we meet at lobby then we going out for more product knowledge then it was time for dinner!!!
Eskimo restaurant offers monthly seasonal changes to the menu and gourmet ingredients from local macau produces.as i reading the menu,we had no idea where we should start.as it is a rare occasion,my colleagues determined to have most ordering different main meals.
Our entree is bella's pruners plate:
The bread was not too dried which i like,i love the rabbit terrine,mango chutney and duck pate.in fact my colleagues scraped these until the other plates were clean while leaving the mustard and cheese.

Consist of yarra valley rabbit terrine with strawberry jam on top,farm house cheese,duck pate(top right),mango chutney salsa(below left),and garlic aioli(top left)with biscotti bread.


Next is calvin's choice of main meal:
He's said that the barramundi is absolute delicious and he liked it cook well done(he's request)
Grilled barramundi,garlic prawn brochette,baby peas,spring onions and confit lemon.
href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixYjY_gV8R_pKGFwrDfLu0meJK5JM3p0mwBJjXEt_nGmmzYmz31PUZBbudqtXoc_rePGSjcwBLnP7K2c6vPtTIEY8waopmzYrMC8Up18aW5ULPBhsyRR_LspSMaC9AFDEHtrvBkQseLk8P/
1600-h/grilled+barramundi%5B1%5D.jpg">


The baby chicken was tender and soft,it seem just ordinary roast chicken,my friend calvin said that it was not a special dish.
Nest is Calvin's order:
a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB6sIAqSZfFIbSXGKCSQnQmN_aCUPRAkHeisaLnpdeWaM9Lsm1yGAQY0nU0VDK05J6UijsDq4DEPjN1IKyzX9COujoIuTFV_cbnEpdR3EMvJH-dam-8IkiadfkBS7R_pE-s26p-eB61waw/s1600-h/baby+chicken+%5B2%5D.jpg">


Boned&roasted baby chicken,truffle foie,pearls onions,creamed celeriac in natural juice,
The veal was tender and everything was the right flavour,the only thing i didn't like is the fried chicken accompanying this dish,it seem not a match,i could easily separated the bacon from the rest of the dish,the mascarpone was melted a bit while we were talking picture each other's dish,i would suggest that the mascarpone should not be salted as it only highlight the salted veal,love the mushroom,seem it was soaked with jus prior cooking and it was juicy.
Mine is:
Noisetters of veal,braised savoy vegetable,salt&pepper mascarpone,mushroom&jus.
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It's classic,but we loved the warm gooey dark chocolate in the centre while it
was cold outside in the macau city,the ice cream was loaded with vanilla bean and it was delicious after your spoon the gooey warm chocolate.as both of us are almost full,we could bot finish the souffle.it was bigger than usual and we loved the intense flavour,next time i will definitely save more place in my tummy for the souffle.
We did have breakfast at eskimo restaurant,i love the breakfast as were provided with fresh fruit like banana with passion fruit instead banana chips at most restaurant do.also,i noticed that the honey was in standing glass container with some pieces of honeycombs.
Both of us loved the dessert:
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Hot chocolate souffle with ice cream vanilla

Monday, February 2, 2009

Maryamah karpov


I just finish Andrea hirata ;ast tetra logy,MARYAMAH KARPOV.well..congratulation to Andrea,i know what most reader said about this book is not true,i've prove it.olie,the genre is not about biographical anymore,because of many hyperbolic thing in it.but this is literature,and everything could happend in it,and literature can be fake as well as real depend on how we interpret it.

I still like your story,and still amaze how can a son can describe his love to his father this great,and how come a man can be in love with someone so deeply and doing many crazy thing to find her again such as being backpacker around Europe and building ship,just only to see her again,just because of a glimpse of her finger.remind me to do meni pedi more often hihihihi.....

One question,why the title is maryamah karpov???Because the story is not about Maryamah karpov,okay...Andrea did not mention her name a bit,and other names and why there are many jokes about someone names in melayu,reminds me of old times school,when we used to call someone from his father names hehehe....

Reading Maryamah,makes me wonder why Andrea is so proud being Melayu,Melayu people is very imaginative and sometimes very good liar....no offense yah...but so as this story.

How genius is lintang,to make accurate calculation in building a ship.and how to explode a sinking ship,i just cant take my breath while reading it!!!if there is a person as genius as lintang,sure i'd like to know one.i like the story about friendship and how we supposed to help each other no matter what...co cuitt...hihihihi...and i like ending of arai and his true love,and i like ending of mahar,eventually found his love,and i like ending of lintang become entrepreneur and rich,so worth with his genius brain,and i like it,because in the end ical has to choose between his greatest love of his father with his greatest love of woman.

Monday, January 26, 2009

I know i'll cry

Dear:Rock

I gave you my trust,i let you my held my hand,i've tasted your sweet kiss i let my self fall though i know i'll cry.i saw heaven in the earth.i walked over the rainbow when i touched you and held your hand i felt the shiver through my heart,cant help it,though i know i'll cry.
I felt safe when i'm in your arms,i saw my way when i looked into your eyes seems i saw the light to my darkest path you've touched my life and i let my self fall though i know i'll cry.i know i care of you maybe this is love i truely felt for you,i let you in my life,i trusted it in your hand i'm lost,but i'am happy this way though i know i'll cry.

MY DAYS

I was downloading that beautiful song''I CRY''(my fav song at the minute)to my mobile/cell phone yesterday to use as my ringtone(mellow songs and bit sad songs just like what i fell in this time)anyway after it finished downloading it said something about being in the wrong format so i went into my settings fiddled about a bit(i love a good fiddle)then it told me to enter my sim pin number wich i did then it told me to eneter new sim pin number and i was like.
So i made up a new one confirmed it(this happened three times)and it kept telling me''CODE INVALID''then guess what???they only blocked my phone and sim card i was like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO apparently they do this after three failed attempts to enter your code...so i got on line faster than a hoor in heat..(no wise cracks please)and emailed my mobile phone network to see what i could do..got an''auto replay''email saying they would contact me within 24 hrs...still waiting..i mean how can i live without my mobile??????it's impossible.
Reading online if the sim card is truly f**ked they will send me another one and u can keep the same number,will get my credit back but will lose all my contact numbers,pics,videos and messages,then again maybe loosing a few number might be a good idea saying nothing...so to anyone who has texted me since last night thats the reason why i havent replied...sorry to all.!!!

Friday, January 23, 2009

My Inside Thoughts...

Friday,23,january,2009



For the past several days.i have been rough feelings inside my self,i dont know what was and still going on in my life nowadays,but it seems that nothing works the way it supposed to be.if i review everything for the day that ready happend in my live between me and rock on 13 january,nothing has been easy on me,i feel like everything that i'm doing or everything around me is just DRAINING ALL OF THE ENERGY I HAVE(or even the energy i'am trying to have)I'M ANNOYED FEEL VERY ANNOYED AND WORRIED.i try my best to give him what he want but he do really make me hurt and down,i panicked and from that time on,i cant handle my frustation that i have been trying to deal within my self...
Probably it is not really about that problem only that really make me feel down,since i still can be loyal and patience to him i will do.it is abou t FRUSTATION that is inside of me ,and all i can do is BRUST IN TO TEARS,well prefer to cry rather than yelling oud loud,making all the people in the coridor worder what is happend to me.
I wanted to cry but i never cried until i talked about what happened to my father and my friend yesterday.i guessed it was just the right time for me to let go the frustation.part of me does still feel I'M SO CHILDISH to do what i did yesterday,CRYING.however part of me says it is THE RIGHT THING AND AN OKAY THING to do,it is a RELIEVE??
Today i feel lighter and comfortable with whatever has happened,starting to accept and disgest all the lessons behind it.it is like i can cope now that there will be a solution to it.
it is amazing that my father and my chilhood friend actually could feel that i was crying yesterday without me telling her that i was crying.THEY FEEL LIKE WHAT I FEEL...that is how brilliant a father and trusted friend can be...i wonder WILL BE ABLE TO DO THE SAME THINGS WHEN THEY FEEL LIKE ME.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

MY BROKEN HEART


wednesday.08.january 2009


I HAD LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART,
AND GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR YOU,
THINGKING THAT YOU ARE WORTHY OF MY LOVE,
THINKING THAT YOU WILL BE TRUE...

I HAVE TRUSTED YOU A LOT AND BROKE
MY TRUST SO MANY TIMES...
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS BREAKS MY HEARTS??
WHY ARE YOU KILLING ME INSIDE??

WHY DO I LOVED YOU???
I ASK THIS QUESTION A MILLION TIMES,
WHY DID WE MEET EACH OTHER?
WHEN U WILL ONLY BREAK MY HEART ONLY?
WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE ALL YHESE HARDSHIPS IN LIFE?
WHY OH WHY IT'S TEARING ME APART.

THERE ARE TIMES THAT I WANTED TO GIVE UP
BECAUSE IT'S DRAINING MY STRENGTH
MAKING ME WEAK IN AND OUT
WANTING TO VANISH WITH THE AIR,
OH MY GOD HOW WILL I EVER SURVIVE??

WHY DO YOU LIE ALL THE TIME?
EVEN IF I HAVE ALL THE PROOFS,THAT COULD NAIL YOU DOWN.
MAKING THINGS WORST AS THEY ALREADY ARE.
WHY CAN'T YOU ADMIT THAT YOU MADE A MISTAKE
INSTEAD OF DENYING IT THAT ONLY MAKES ME CRY.

DO YOU REALLY LOVE ME??
DID YOU EVER TRY??
HOW TRUE IS YOUR LOVE FOR ME,PLEASE TELL ME NOW??
MY BROKEN HEART WILL HEAL I KNOW
DO I HAVE TO LIVE WITH FEAR THAT YOU WILL LEAVE ME
ONE DAY,BECAUSE YOU FOUND A NEW LOVE?THAT WILL LEAVE ME BEHIND

DO YOU WANT ME TO FIGHT FOR MY LOVE??
OR WOULD YOU RATHER LET ME GO OF YOU
TO LESSEN THE MISERIES I HAD.
WOULD IT MAKE YOU HAPPY IF I'LL LET YOU GO?
THOUGH IT WOULD HURT ME SO MUCH
TELL ME WHAT TO DO,PLS HELP ME OUT...

MY BROKEN HEART WILL HEAL I KNOW
IT WILL TAKE SOMETIME BUT IT WILL GO,
IT WILL LEAVE A SCAR,THAT WILL REMIND ME OF YOU
BUT MY FORGIVENESS IS THERE AND THAT BECAUSE
I LOVE YOU......

FUN SUNDAY



DESPITE OF THE FACT THAT I WAS IN PAIN OF HAVING BAD HEADEACH IN THIS FEW DAYS,I HAD A GREAT SUNDAY WITH MY FRIEND,WE GOT THIS FABULOUS 2FOR1 VOUCHER FROM''PIZZA EXPRESS''WHICH WE NORMALLY WILL NOT GO BECAUSE OF THE PRICE,WE HAD A LONG WALK FROM HOME TO THE RESTAURANT,WITCH IS BY THE DOCK.
WE ORDERED A''ARRANCINI''AS AN APPETIZER,WHICH IS RISOTTO AND CHICKEN HAM COVERED AND FRIED WITH BREAD CRUMBS,AS OUR MAIN,I HAD DIAVOLO CLASSIC PIZZA,DEVILISHY HOT WITH SPICY BEEF,PEPERONI,ONIONS AND TABASCO,WITH HOT GREEN OR JALAPENO PEPPERS,AND OTHERS I HAD POLLO VERDURE SALAD,A WARM FEAST OF TORN CHICKEN BREAST AND CHARGRILLED ITALIAN VEGETABLES TOSSED WITH HONEY AND MUSTARD DRESSING,SERVED ON ROCKET AND BABY SPINACH AND DRIZZLED WITH BALSAMIC SYRUP,THEY BOTH WERE VERY YUMMY,ESPACIALLY MY SALAD...UUUGGGHHHH I;D LOVE TO HAVE ANOTHER ONE HEHEHEHE,,,,TIRAMISU WAS OUR DESSERT,WOOOOOOOO,,,,SO DELICIOUSLY MELTING-IN-MOUTH SENSATION.

AFTER OUR SUPER DUPER DELICIOUS LATE LUNCH,WE WENT TO CINEMA AND WATCHED MADAGASCAR 2,I LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IT HILLARIOUSLY FUNNY.WELL,THAT'S OUR SUNDAY,HOW WAS YOUR SUNDAY???

TURN A NEW LEAF

Thursday,january 01.2009

It's all been the second hour of the new year 2009,i'm still awake here in the lonely night only with my friend(CALVIN)i speand,but not making me much totally happy huhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,i really miss my love there(hongkong city)what he do there.with whome,and where he going to celebrate this new year???many question in my mind abt that.

Well,shall i talk abt my new year's eve first??i had lunch at japanese restaurant,where i almost exploded my stomach with the free chrisantemum tea,after that we go to watch the movie''AUSTRALIA''is very good movie''(i crying while i both the ticket for me and calvin.i remember that time when me and rock was delaying to watch the movie bcoz of my mistake)the story is so true,deep and touchy,all the stars playet well,the quality of the movie is indeed fantastic,its as if was watching a set of living photographs,breath-taking scenes of the movie is indeed fantastic,it's as if was watching a actors and actresses!!!it is a must see movie.

Enough of the new year's eve thing.....
2008 was year full of lessons for me,lessons to be a good lovers,we faught here and there,thanks god,those times teach us to understand deeperabout each other.Each day of my life brings me to greater appreciation of having''ROCK''in my life,i truly thank the lord for such a wonderfully caring and loving lovers i have(maybe even not totally)We learn to support each other and together we knit our stories,build our relationship more strongger,and expeRience our journey happiness.
Just several minutes ago,i was enjoying the view of beautiful fireworks outside my window.yeah...this week each year,they have a fireworks show on friday or saturday*they call it born-fire night.I'm always amazed by the colourful view the fireworks given in a dark sky of the night,this experience can only be enjoyed by the bare-eyes and often can be express through picture/photos.seeing it straight away gives a different and better feeling abt it.
it is a pity though...fireworks only last a few second and they are gone by then,otherwise,wouldn't it be a beautiful decoration on the night skies??

Sunday, January 4, 2009

About Me

It again for the second times as a request from such a warm''GREAT''friend''Calvin''let me start...
ANOTHER 10 THINGS ABOUT ME''HANY''
1) She is very PERFECTIONIST person,who would stress herself out(and sometimes to the measure of depression)to do things as perfect as she wants.
2) Be who she is,say exacly what her mind and heart say and won't even act nice if her heart is disliking something,Too STRAIGHT FORWARD??maybe....
3) She enjoys cross-stitching,knitting,scrapbooking and sometimes sketching random things,after sometime of not knitting,i will soon start knitting a pair of mitten for my love,i hope it will work out well.
4) She dreams of having twins!!!Tee-hee...
5) She has super sensitive nose that even my friend always think and said that''hany''was a doggy in the previos life''bite rock''hahahahah...
6) People's first impression of her''RUDE,AROGANT,QUIET AND JUDES''(mungkin krn modelku garang x yeeeeeeeee)The impression after:talkactive and such a crazy gal!!!
7) She is super quiet when she is angry and always puts such a face that friend around and maybr also rock really hates(i'm working hard on reducing my temper)
8) She loves cyicling,but hates other sports,that reminds me of old time when i always compete with my BFF for fun.
9) She is not morning person.
10) She has no regrets,anything i do,i do it with pleasure,even there might be some not so good time in between.in my life,i have no regrets and will never have,i cherish everything that happends in my life,anyone that comes into my life and all that has been given into me,for i believe nothing good will come out of regret)
Cal..thanks once again for such a prise and the prayer*hugs*
ps.Anyone would like to this???you are most wellcome to do so....

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Making Him Smile...!!!

wed,29 oct 2008
It's been a while since i planed to buy him new LAPTOP for his birthday gift,yeah actually i have ready both laptop for him few month ago,but after seen other model new arriaval with ame brand he wanted too.i have been surveying on prices of different stores,voila...yesterday we found a great price in one of the store in electric shop.got 30% discount of the normal price plus 150 cashback from HP laptop.thus the cheapest price i found...!!!
And i made him smile so wide and brighly..oh god..i love to make him smile.
ps:so now he has a new LAPTOP and been busy with it..!!!

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Life goes on

Firstly i'd like to thank everyone who has tried to cheer me up and brighten my feeling,the disappointed lingered of my self for days in me.it strucked me even deeper when my parents asked about it(i knew they would anywy...)but they know there is nothing can be done to change my marks,the most i can do and should do is to do my best in my own life,i shall not stop.Today during my prayer time my aunt call me and sk how was in hk.i did said can u call me after my prayer time?then she ask me wether there is anything i need to be prayed on?The first word that came out from my mouth ws''confident'',i needed it so bad that i was not sure whether i can pass my bachelor with good degree as my aunt was talking.after i cut off the phone i could not help but cried i felt relatived as if all burden in my heart has been lifted up by allah.I haven't cried so much on my own lately..usually i cry to him on my own when there is a matter or two,maybe i kept it inside my self this time and it sure was painful.After i finish praying i felt much better,i felt my heart was light and i'am stronger and confident.now i can say to my self''i'am able to go through this''do my best and get a good degree.i feel great smile on my face.
As i call my chilhood friend who always praying for me was smiling at me giving me a sense and happiness''nothing wasted''he's said.it open my mind the lord let me to go through all of these things for purpose.even if it is painful in this present time and may seem useless at all to the future.it is great feeling to know that all of these thing,all of these lesson and knowledge won't be wasted,the time will come when i will using what i have learned now,i'm happy now......

I feeling so upsed


Today i'm feeling so upsed..yeah while my friend call me this morning i wanted to cry and scream loudly,so let whole world knowing what kind of things that can making me feel so upsed.
My friend had telling me about her birthday,i feel so jelous with that but what kind i do?she had an surprise from her bf and also sweet greating from the fone,card,and sms.she did recieve in the midlle of the night at 12pm.oh..my god that sooooo sweet and why i can't hide my tears from my eyes when i hear she talk about this this morning?i imagine if someone i love doing the same for me on my birthday last month!!!but tha only a dream from me,coz on that time my bf didn't say anything for me,and he didn't text me something sweet on that time.he did say forget while i remind him on his birthday.my heart was crying how could he's forget my birthday?did he really love me?why did he forget on my birthday?and why did he can remember other people birthday?i wish i could have a wonderful story like my friend.but when and whom going to give me any surprise??why i can't stop my tears while i remember this story?
No matter about him did he really forget or what i don't even know the reason,maybe i'm not so special for him like other yeah maybe.anyway i also had a great birthday(even though i still feel that it is not complete yet,since someone forgoten my birthday)i did remember always that happend,it's so wonderful for my life even my heart crying alot,yeah that time i was going to my friend's place to fix her computer,i was actually being set up for her.(i didn't know they planned a surprise little party for me)it seen really crazy that time my heart feel like out from my chest when i knock the door and start go in her house they said''SURPRISEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!''luckly my heart ws so strong inside there.my tears roll down from my eyes,how could other people remember my birthday and someone i love had forgoten about that?huh.....
It was very nice,there were nine of us including me,four other indonesians and four of them from deferent parts of the world.they cooked me delicious meals like:laksa,chicken rice,fried chicken,sushi,and veg eeeemmm yummy...!!!they sang me''HAPPY BIRTHDAY SONG''and gave me a chocolate birthday cake.that was the second surprise''while i was went to toilet and when i was walking back to the living room it was so quiet,i didn't know what is going on again.then i went in there the room was dark,and they sang and i saw a cake with candle there...i'm so surprise with that i begin to cry in happiness.they gave me a sweet greeting and present too ooohhh i really feel a,amazed when i remember that time.
Yeah i can't forget that memory in 26-june-2008 is so wonderful story of my life that i never had before.yeah...anyway one of them are had indonesia boy.so we all really having fun that time.after dinner let the games begins...yeah..we'll playing game together,first game we'll play''scirsos,paper,stone''i need to fight 8 person that time,if one of us loose we need to eat one sushi yeeee...that was the starter crazy i'm so full and can't take ot anymore,then after half of the game we'll agree to change the sushi to water,oh my god we'll keep on playimg and playing any other games,and i do lost 14 times heheheh..so i had 11 big cups of water.
they all really play me on that time.i feel so tired,and sleepy.but my friend don't let me go to sleep even a while only uuuggghhh my eyes soooo heavy and very hard to opened,but they keep saying u can't go to sleep coz ur the birthday girl,oh my god...!!!
But finally they all feel pity with me after they seen my eyes can't opened anymore,they let me go to sleep and took some rest..yeah ur so good friend heheehe....i slept on her bed for while(thanks dear)and ended up i wanted to going home coz i could not slept well there.then while i'm home ready in early morning around 4 and 5 aclock i recieve many sms greating from my friend,but there no any sms i recieve from someone ilove,and so i begin to crying at that time.messege from my chilhood friend:
''where did you having little party yesterday''
''what kind of surprise party from yr from and other?''
''what did u eat for dinner?u did keep drinking water 11 big cups right?coz u did lost playing a game''oooooopppssss...how did he know???
''big question sign inside my head''how did he know what was i get and did that night''
''at that point i was a bit worried that he might reach negatively thinking..oohhh nooo''
But still feel my stomach is funny on next morning.i don't feel like eating,but my head get headech coz not enough sleept on that time,anyway it was a nice and sweet birthday surprise for me,from inside my heart i said thank you for everyone who said''happy birthday''to me,for my''chilhood friend'' that ready send me care enough to send a b'day card,sms,and gave me a call and say sweet greating first time than other.for my friend''Calvin''that gave me big mickey mouse doll,for my friend''Deandra''that gave me''mobile phone''for my birth present.for my friend''Tari''that gave me silver pendent that has my birthday sign.for my friend''Alin''that gave me''My favorite movie disc''for my mum and dad and also my bro that sending me something special heheh...and also big thanks from my deep heart for al my other friend who has big care for me by sending sms and sweet greeting,thank you so..so..muchhhhhhh.anyway now i'm 23 years old.....

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Say a little prayer


One thing that keeps me a live all these yers was prayers,honestly as a person,i'am fragile inside,i cry easly,break down easily,wrry easily,want to give up easily and complain about this and that easily too,this is the real me.One that makes my parents,especially my mum,worry so much.However there is one powerful thing in this world that can keep a person a live,even the most fragile person.it's PRAYER.i'am thankful so much grateful to those,who never fail to say their prayers for me each time of their lives,my parent and my brother,and so my friend....they all give me strength and they will carry on living,to continue whatever i'm doing no matter hard nd impossible things are,they all make me feel loved.I,too,don't get lonely here or there without my family because of prayers...it's a wy to comunicate with god(allah)he is my everything.I believe,prayer are powerful,there are such things call mirales,yeah i supposed just think life it self miracles,and miracles can happend if we have a strong will to pray and to faith that it will happend.

Painful headache

I did not much this day,simply because i kept getting the same painful headache from the moment i opened my eyes those morning,it's bothered me so much that i start to wonder what cause this pain.
My friend said Anemia or even lack of oxygen in my brain...well those are really something for guess.....The headache makes me don't even want to get up from bed since it is painful...aaarrhhhh how i'm supposed to get up tomorrow to go somewhere early in the morning with this pain??it all begins again tomorrow...the deadly assigggggments and not-fun at all.

Uggggggggghhhhhhhhhh

Tuesday,september 16,2008

I managed to get my self out of bed on time this morning,ready to go for some exercise or do some cleaning in my room,i just ignored the headache so that i don't get bothered by it.reach at the park as the earliest attendant and was really looking forward to see the new person...hehehhe...one,two,there familiar faes come along at the park to do some exercise too,but much of them are do jogging and do some other exercise.while i do jogging was about to start,then a completely unfamiliar fe showed up,it was a''GUY''!!!...the uncle who walk beside to me instanly laughing after seeing my face expresion.whatttttttt...??another guy!!out of disbelief,it is true he is the one,i thought was a girl...yeah thanks to god..i put my hope high that the person would be a girl eeeeemmmm....
so yeah..now it's even toughter for me,a girl competing with that guy just great...and perfect.
I'm really tired today,extremly tired.even when i met my friend in a supermrket,she said i look exhausted,yes...i'am.my mind was blank,walking like a robot around city centre.luckily i managed to get part of my grocery shopping done.i go around the city super market to get some cheap veggies,apple,brown pear,yogurt and milk uuugghhhhh very heavy though,my hands felt like falling apart.And today's weather is so hooooooottttttttt and on top of that the sun really shining down on my head strongly.right just perfect combination for me.

Monday, September 15, 2008

I really fell upset

These days i so often call my parent on the phone and on home phone,but they not answer my call till 10 times,i'm in big tension and so worry with them all''my mum,my dad,and my bro''what's going on??but i'm not giving up and do keep on trying to call them,coz since two month ago i didn't call my parent like usually,coz i don't know how to explain to them specially my parent(i'm sorry mum,and dad,i really miss u all,but what can i do???)
Anyway i'm so happy when finally they answer my call(thanks god,they are still fine)i'm talking so much with my parent and so i ask them why did they didn't answer my call just now?my dad said they leave the phone at home and they where in my uncle house coz my elder cousin get some accident.me and my dad talking here and there and also do some joking hehehhe...it's really make me happy today,but that happy felling of mine are not stay longer,it stop since my dad told me about ramadan there and also about eid-.i know they are preparing for eid this time.but i try to whisper my self''it's ok hani..next time u can have time to celebrate with them,inshaalah''.
And so i can cheer up again after all,then sudelly my dad asking me''daughter...u had promise with us b4 eid-u will earn money for the eid-day?because u said to me that don't took any amount from my own acount for the eid,so i didn't took it to buy everything''Ohh...god,i forgot with my promise(well anyway i'm not forget with promise i had said to my parent)but for now i didn't have any money....yeah...i ready took all of my ammount for my parent to go in''mecca''so nothing leave now,only leeft $10.000 hk dlr but i could took that money,usually i need to send money for eid- since first of sept,but i didn't send it coz someone(.....???)aks me to send amount for him to buy some medicine for him self,i really confused that time wich one i must do transfer the money?my parent or him?coz both of them are meaningful in my life,and i dont know what should i do?
Finally i had to choose one of them,and so i did choose him coz he need more that money but beside that i'm crying alot coz i ignored my own parent and ask them to wait without say anything.and now the eid- is coming soon where i can get the money from and send to them like i had fullfill my promise to them?i really confused this time,event they have money in their account but i dont want they use the own money for this.and what should i doooooooooooooooo?????i can't say anything to them in this time and i don't know what to do?if i send first of next month it's too late for this,but if i don't send what will they think about me?for all my family(mum,dad,bro)from bottom of my heart i really sy sorry for this,coz i can't fulfill my own promise this time,i really so sorry for all.(i'm really fell upset dady...i wish u don't fell how upset was my felling this time and wish u don't fell that i'm crying alot since i call u today,pls don't think negative about me....i will fulfill all my promise.i do love you all...)