Umbrella of sadness

29,march,2009

Right now i'm sitting on my bed thinking and crying my eyes out,i feel so alone like there's no one who will listen from the looks of things now,it doesn't seem like i'll ever be truly happy.i had so many dreams,but they are all fading fast,i'm scared i'll feel like this forever,i dont see the point of going on.
I thought about my life and my relationship constantly and sank into a deep depression that lasted for months.huddled under an ever present umbrella of sadness,i wondered if i would ever feel joy again,my sleeping patterns changes and althought i slept most of time,i still battled fatigue,irritability and moodiness.
But i'm beginning to relized somethings there is so much rage inside me that needs to come out and i have a short fuse.i never caunly talk through a problem with the other person,i either yell and scream or ignore the person i'm mad at while seething inside it has become a habit for me.